Spotted: Eligible Bachelor

Spotted -- Eligible Bachelor -- wearing a vile of Disarrono around his neck. Inappropriately attired in a bear skin coat, I was unable to communicate properly my approval of such a strong move, but in a moments flash Bachelor let out a loud and abrupt grunt, a la Anthony Hopkins in Legends of the Fall, from which he broke a chalice over the bar, then proceeded to challenge any incontinent females to a pullup contest.